I know this because I wanted a dad more than a fucking pony at Christmas...a real dad that didn't hurt me and scare the living shit out of me and played some type of ball with me and tickled me and called me princess and lil punkin and who's smile and laughter lit up my life.
A daddy that I ran to at breakneck speed when he got home from work and almost break his back with my hugs and kisses.
I could ride on top of his shoulders when we went to the park and feel like I ruled a kingdom.
A dad that came to school on Career Day and I could whisper with excitement to all my friends,"that's MY daddy!"
I wanted to be totally in love with my dad till I hit puberty and that strange awkwardness came into play...yes, even that is special.
A dad to get all grumpy and look intensely at my boyfriends and threaten to kill them if they laid a hand on me.
A daddy to give me away at the altar to a man that was just as kind and strong and smart as he was, a man that my father respected and knew would take care of his little girl-"only the best for my daughter".
Someone I could base all my future encounters from a solid base of love & light that only can come from a good dad...and especially, to not be afraid of men.
But, I didn't have that, so, fuck it, moving on, moving on...
So, all you daddies: Fucking A kudos to you...good job, pat on the back...your children are better in this world because you exist.
I even and most importantly...wish my ex a Happy Father's Day because without him, I wouldn't have the greatest blessings my life has ever known. My babies, my angels, my world, my breath.
And I truly wish, with all my heart...that he enjoys this special day with his children and they enjoy this day with their daddy.
*and those of you that know my history...no, I have not lost my mind :)